Title: Different sides, different letters.
Author: Mayra (Mayra.Rienties@zonnet.nl)
Time setting: Just after Tara moved out of the Summerís residence.
Disclaimer: I donít own Tara, Willow or any of the others, thatís Joshís dump luck.
Summary: Willow writes Tara a letter.
Note: Thanks Dana for interrupting me wile I was writing, LOL
I know I probably shouldnít write you so soon after. . . you know. . . you left. Iím probably only making things worse by doing this, but I canít help it. Tara, I want you back, so badly. I canít stand being away from you. I thought it was bad when Oz left, but it was nothing compared to loosing you. Tara I love you so much!
I know I donít deserve a second chance, but I know I didnít deserve you in the first place, so maybe I have a chance to make everything alright again. Tara, I really wanna make everything alright again, and not in the way I tried that before you left. I want you to trust me again, no more spells, I promise. Iím doing really good, itís bad, and hard, but I havenít used magic anymore. Iím not trying to make you go all guilt-trippy, I just. . . wanna let you know, you know? Well, of course you know, I just told you, but I- Wait, Iím all babble-mode here, arenít I? Iím sorry, I canít seem to stop that. I have all these beautiful apologizes in my head, but when I try to say or write them. . . they wonít come out and then Iím all Ďhey, why canít I just say themí all of a sudden.
Anyway, I was trying to tell you how much I miss you. I really mean that Tara, everything is so. . . empty without you. There is this big ball Oí nothing stuck everywhere you use to be. I feel it in the living room, the kitchen, and most of all: Our- my bedroom. The bed it way to big without you shearing it with me. I really donít mean to push, and I know Iím in no position to. . . you know. . . push, but I wanna see you again. I mean, not in a way-soon way, but in a well-maybe-we-could-go-for-coffee-in-a-few-weeks-sort-of-way.
Tara, I really shouldnít say this, but Iím going to say it anyway: I MISS YOU AND I WANT YOU BACK. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IT HURTS. It hurts to be without you, like a stake through the hart. Only you can fix that, but I understand why you probably never want to see me again, and Iím going to respect that.
Iím going to give this a lot of time, and I understand if you never want to talk to me again. Just let me know. Tara, I need to know where we are, where we are heading to. You donít owe me anything, and if you say "Get out of my life I never want to talk to you again" Iím gonna respect that, just like you have always respected me. Iím the one who screwed up here Tara. I hurt you so much! And Iím so terribly sorry about that! I wish there was some way to change it all. A way that doesnít involve magic. And when I think about that, there is only one solution: There is no way to do that, and I just have to make due with what I have done, or messed upÖ Iím not sure what the best term in this case is.
Well. . . I think Iíd better stop writing before I make a complete fool out of myself. . . I think Iím way to late for that right?
Please Tara, just think about it. No rush, no pushing, no hastiness, never again! Please. . . try to give me a second chance. . .
"God, thatís so stupid!" Willow said and tore up the piece of butterfly covered paper. She couldnít sent something like that to Tara! That was all "Hey, you have to get back together with me, or else" And that was no good at all! She had screwed up, and she knew it! The magic had. . . taken control of her, she had never meant to hurt Tara, she had never wanted to do that, but she had, and there was no excuse. There was no way Tara should forgive her again. . .